


Much Obliged

by nursehelena



Series: Meanwhile, Off-Screen... [6]
Category: Metalocalypse
Genre: Bickering, Fertilityklok Coda, M/M, Making Out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-24
Updated: 2015-02-24
Packaged: 2018-03-14 21:46:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3426668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nursehelena/pseuds/nursehelena
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Toki's gone through all the rings to find his ladymate, the love of his life, but he's got an embarrassing problem: he doesn't know how to kiss. </p><p>(Tumblr prompt for anon: Skwisgaar and Toki with "shippy au where one doesn’t know how to kiss & the other teaches them step by step & it turns into this hot makeout session & 'wow i did not know you could do that'")</p>
            </blockquote>





	Much Obliged

Due to the intensity of the bet Skwisgaar made with Murderface, he didn't take much time between lays to recuperate. Riding off the high from embarrassing his bandmate made it easy to keep getting his dick up in order to earn yet another pair of panties. He could probably stop now, since Murderface had absolutely zero chance of matching even one-percent of the number he so far earned. However, for the sake of totally destroying Murderface's already lacking self-esteem, Skwisgaar would keep on until the allotted time period was up. 

He didn't expect a knock on his bedroom door since he hadn't requested the next in line be sent in yet. A roll of the eyes followed a meek, high-pitched voice from the other side. “Skwisgaar, is Toki. Ares you busy, rights now?” 

“No, come ons in.” Chattering from all the women swelled briefly, as the door opened and snapped back shut. Toki didn't look very confident, although that bettered when Skwisgaar obscured his bare ass in denim and turned to face him after donning a fresh tee shirt. “What dids you needs?” 

“Well. . .I'ms looking for advice.” Toki took a seat on the corner chair, blinking in the sunlight that shone directly into his eyes. He shaded himself against it with a hand, although still resorted to squinting. “I trieds to ask Moidaface but he's havings one of those 'boohoo, poor me' days and is no helps at all.” 

“Pff, what woulds you ask Moidaface for advice for? How to lose magnificentsly at somet'ing?” 

“No. . .” Toki hesitated, probably because he was already well-steeped in that particular non-achievement. “But I thinks you're probablies the better one to ask, since you haves a lot more experience with the ladies than he does anyways.” 

“So den why asks him in de forst place?” 

“You'ves been very hard to reach lately.” 

“Ja,” Skwisgaar agreed with a stretch before plopping onto his bedside. He might need a nap before his next lay, come to think of it. “So what ams you looking for, Toki?” 

“I haves that hot date comings up with my ladymate on Saturday nights, and I'm a littles nervous.” Toki tucked some hair behind his ear in a manner to reflect that. “I gots all kind of greats advice from Pickle and Nathans, but I didn't want to admit something really embarrassings to them because they talks down to me.” 

“And what ams dat?” If Toki didn't mention his aversion toward such a reaction, Skwisgaar too would've probably reverted to his default condescendence. 

“I don'ts think I'm all that greats of a kisser?” Toki ventured, reddening in the cheeks. “Every times I kiss a goil, she acts all boreds or likes I did something bad. Does you have any tips?” 

“Hmm. . .” Skwisgaar rubbed his chin. “Comes here.” 

When Toki sat down beside him, Skwisgaar scooted over to eliminate the rest of the space. Toki’s eyes widened as result from confusion, then his eyebrows rose with Skwisgaar’s next command. “Why woulds I kiss you?” 

“Because, littles dildo, I can’ts tell you what you ams doings wrong if I don’ts know what you ams doings in de forst place.” Skwisgaar leaned back on his hands. “What dids you expect when you comes here? Dat I defines what kissings _ams?_ Dat I tells you to puts your lips onto hers, and den moves dem around untils you gets bored of it?” 

Toki still hesitated. “I don’ts know. . .is pretties gay to kiss a guy, isn’ts it?” 

“De ends justify de means. Ifs you wants to keeps learning substandord lessons from de ot’er guys, be my guest. You wants to learn from de master of satisfyings womens, den you comes into _my_ court.” 

Toki’s lips pursed in the telltale way that he was about to argue, but a glance toward the door drove home that women literally lined up to get the Skwisgaar Skwigelf experience. A slump in his shoulder transformed his demeanour into one conveying defeat and agreement. Skwisgaar recognized it immediately, from nearly every single time they converged with their guitars. “Oh, fucks me. . .the things I do to gets a lady.” 

“Dat ams de spirits.” From all the action Skwisgaar received lately, he couldn’t really be in less of a mood for something as incomplete and misleading as this. However hard he was on Toki though, he cared about him on some level and wanted him to succeed. Skwisgaar acknowledged through this entire contest with Murderface that he rarely left any women for the others to enjoy. If Toki wanted just one that he could marry, have a family with, and all that other romantic bullshit, then Skwisgaar was going to pave the way to being Best Man. The Best Man _always_ got the most women at the wedding, not that he needed the advantage, but competitive nature meant anyone else getting that position would pound Skwisgaar to dust. “I don’ts bite right off de bat, so what ams de worst t’ing dat could happens? You ends up liking it?” 

“Actuallies, ja. That _is_ the worst thing.” 

“Pff,” Skwisgaar scoffed. “Quits being a chicken. Kiss me.” 

Toki cringed one last time before clumsily looming closer. Skwisgaar leaned in to accommodate him, not that it made much of a difference. After a bare press of lips, he frowned. “Well, for ones, I amn’ts your grandmother, and I hopes dat you aren’ts going to treat your ladymate like dat. Wills be over before you knows it.” 

“That isn’ts how I kiss ladies. This is reallies hards! Why can’ts you just gives me some tips?” 

“You want some tips? Heres dey am. Forst of all, don’ts treats her like she ams a family member. Two, I seriously hopes you won’ts make de face or de fuss you just dids wit’ me, or else you won’ts have to whines and complains to lets her know she amn’ts wanteds.” 

“You aren’ts _her_ , Skwisgaar! Kissings you isn’ts the same as it will be with her, and I probablies shouldn’t be kissings you anyway, since me and her are goings to be togethers forevers.” 

“Wills you, if dis am de kind of treatment she will gets?” 

“No, but this isn’ts how I would treats her.” 

“All rights, den.” Skwisgaar yawned boredly. “Haves fun beings a shitty kisser. Ifs you don’ts mind, I mights to get laids again.” 

Reverse psychology worked wonders on Toki. He was always ready to storm out of the room until told to leave. Then, stubbornly as was possible, he’d prolong his stay. To make that toiling inner war easy on him, Skwisgaar levelled to compromise. “Tells you whats. How abouts insteads of you kissings me, I’ll kiss _you_ forst. Woulds dat work better to breaks de ice here?” 

“I guess.” 

“Okay, so now pays attention to what I ams goings to tell you. Dere am a science behinds dis, all rights? You needs to figure some t’ing out befores you tries to kiss her.” Skwisgaar scooted closer yet again, since Toki had added to the gap between them out of discomfort. Pressing hips earned a squirm, although Toki leaned into a lowered tone. “You needs to be able to know when she ams ready to be kissed. De forst indicator am space. If you ams dis close and your convorsation ams low, it ams a sign of intimacy. Maybe she ams touching you, laughings at funny t’ing you say, or just lookings at you de right way. Dere ams plenty of indicators, de t’ing dat ties dem all toget’er beings eye contact.” 

Toki met Skwisgaar’s gaze briefly, but he was still preoccupied by dulcet tones and how the backs of Skwisgaar’s fingers skimmed over his upper arm. 

“Looks at my eye. You needs to be comfortable wit’ dat, ats dis distance.” 

“I ams, just nots with you.” 

“Pretends for a minute, den.” 

It came with a sigh, but Skwisgaar would accept it. This was part of his plan to lower Toki’s inhibitions. So long as they could get over this hump, Toki would be far more susceptible to his advice. Toki blinked when Skwisgaar’s gaze directed briefly to his lips, achieving the goal of setting them into a relaxed part. Predictably, Toki’s breathing rate increased as Skwisgaar moved in, re-establishing eye contact whenever necessary to up the anticipation. Kissing wasn’t a bad activity, no matter who Skwisgaar might be placing his lips on. So long as they smelled good, tasted good, and made him _feel_ good, what was the harm? Toki was already one for three, seemingly as fresh from the shower as his clothes were from the laundry. 

Skwisgaar kept first contact soft, for the weighty nature of his lips would dole out their own damage. Predictably, despite Toki’s earlier fuss, he melted into it rather quickly. That was about as far as Skwisgaar could go without saying something though, for the greedy nature Toki tried to take over with reminded him that this was indeed a lesson. “Don’ts get impatient.” 

Toki backed off, softening his pucker and readjusting to match Skwisgaar’s calm yet powerful intensity. Going too far in the other direction knocked their front teeth and earned a whispered apology, but by the time shortness of breath forced them to cease for the moment, Toki at least seemed to understand that particular basic. 

“Nots bad,” Skwisgaar murmured; he intended to stay close because, no matter how swollen Toki’s lips were, they weren’t finished yet. “Whens you ams ready, takes all de t’ing I haves taught you so far and gives it a shot.” 

Finally, Toki defied Skwisgaar’s expectations. In the moments between, it was so easy to get lost. Maybe awkwardness would seep in, or just a hard dose of reality. Neither seemed to exist in the tiny bubble they’d willed around them, which allowed not only for such proximity that Skwisgaar could hear the tiniest whistle in Toki’s nose hinting at a receding cold, but for tentative fingertips to gently graze his cheek before tucking some stray hair away behind his ear. Certain that that on top of the look he currently received would melt whoever this mysterious ladymate was, Skwisgaar set his forehead to Toki’s and closed his eyes to see if he’d pick up the hint. Sure enough, the previous ruin he’d dished out came back to him. 

Relative thinness to Toki’s lips didn’t matter in comparison to how he used them. A firm hand on the back of Skwisgaar’s neck helped as well, but gentle nibbles on his lower lip followed by a brief suck stirred something. Perhaps the refractory period following his last lay came to a close. Or maybe, objectively, it was actually kind of hot to make out with Toki in here while dozens of women waited outside. Purpose detached itself from all of them, so that Skwisgaar couldn’t remember why exactly they all stood there. He didn’t care to summon reason for why _Toki_ was either, for now he’d hit all three of Skwisgaar’s criteria for a make out partner. The shower Toki happened to take before coming here had been accompanied by minty toothpaste, and heat extended to each of Skwisgaar’s nerve ends. If Toki could manage to make him feel curious and vulnerable, sensations that didn’t afflict him often at all (or often _enough_ , he decided), then like hell he was going to cut it short by telling Toki he was going to do just fine. 

“Little t’ings like dat ams good,” Skwisgaar said in regards to careful use of teeth and suction, “but don’t just sticks your tongue in someone’s mouth like dat. Dere ams a more subtles way to does it.” 

He tilted his head more, demonstrating for Toki how not to imitate a child sticking its tongue out at someone else. The groan he earned as everything slid correctly against each other dropped low in Skwisgaar’s abdomen. Along with a furrow in his brow, it facilitated the hare-brained conclusion that while Toki proved himself capable of kissing, maybe Skwisgaar ought to check how he fared for other types of foreplay. 

“So dis ams a good time to starts touching underneath de clothes.” Skwisgaar slid a hand over Toki’s abdominal muscles to demonstrate. “Starts working dem off.” 

Glimpse of a glassy gaze told Skwisgaar that Toki was just as gone. No forethought preceded equal touch, nor when Skwisgaar could lean into a thumb teasing one of his nipples. Gaping, air-dried lips directed toward the ceiling when Toki took a break from his mouth to give his neck some attention. Now came the time that Skwisgaar had to bite a noise back, not that it mattered once Toki gathered enough mental steam to speak. 

“What kinds of things will make her moan?” 

The pronoun threw Skwisgaar off; he conveniently forgot that there was a woman somewhere in all this. “Just keeps doing dat. De ears am good too.” 

They didn’t go neglected, although dominance emerged through confidence first. Skwisgaar was comfortable with his back against the bed, curious as to how far Toki would let this go. Considering all the sex Skwisgaar had lately—all the women—he wouldn’t mind keeping that train going albeit with a crucial change up. His toes curled preemptively at the thought and, coupled with a tongue in his ear canal, Skwisgaar offered up the moan he’d promised. It traveled through Toki like lightning, jolting his spine and turning his touch more erratic. Resultant clumsiness in the mouth that returned to Skwisgaar’s lips brought him back to guidance mode. 

Toki gasped when cupped through his jeans, lost gaze meeting Skwisgaar’s again. “Now here ams de challenge: keeps up de good work when you ams distracted.” 

And Skwisgaar certainly made sure he was. Palming him instilled a quiver, let alone when nimble fingers made quick work of Toki’s fly and pushed his jeans down off his backside. A warm string of precum landed on an exposed sliver of Skwisgaar’s stomach, then wet his fingers. Toki fought against himself, thrusting helplessly into Skwisgaar’s hand a couple times before forcing himself to back away. Part of Skwisgaar was disappointed for that, but he couldn’t complain when it meant his shirt was roughly pushed up to his collar bone so that his chest could earn some attention. Suddenly severely annoyed with the fabric, Skwisgaar pulled it the rest of the way off. Toki’s had to go too, he decided. Both their shirts unceremoniously tossed onto the floor left nothing between Toki’s mouth and the belt buckle he slowly and steadily worked toward. By the time he reached it, brown hair formed a gnarly mess in Skwisgaar’s hands. 

However, Toki’s chin hitting cool metal triggered a slow in enthusiasm. Skwisgaar continued to hold his hair aloft, torso rising and falling rapidly in time with his breath, but whatever sense suddenly fell upon them visited him as well. Unlike Toki, who looked at him with unsettlement rather than lust, Skwisgaar wasn’t ready for this to end. “Why ams you stopping?” 

“Holy fucks,” Toki whispered under his breath. “Holy fucks, what the hell’s I doings?” 

“What ams you talkings about—?” 

“I’s already cheatings on a lady I haven’ts even met.” Toki sat up, seeking his shirt while pushing the rat’s nest Skwisgaar had made out of his hair away from his face. “Ands with _you_ , of all peoples. This wasn’ts meant to go so far. I’m sorries.” 

“Don’ts apolgesac to me, I hads a great time.” Skwisgaar was too stunned at the sudden cease in activity to properly string together a persuasive argument. “Why you haves to leave?” 

“Thanks for all your help, Skwisgaar. I thinks I gets it now.” After pulling his shirt on—backwards and inside out—Toki cinched his fly. Skwisgaar could still see his erection. “I’ll lets you know how it go.” 

Fuck. Skwisgaar’s head fell back onto the bed after his bedroom door snapped shut behind Toki. What bullshit. He couldn’t help but be pissed that he’d been ditched so quickly, especially when he hadn’t been so involved in his bedroom activities for quite some time. Women were all about numbers recently—longer than this bet had gone on—and Skwisgaar disconnected at some point with the leisurely side of taking someone to bed. 

Stewing about it wasn’t going to get him off, though. Still annoyed, as he would remain until orgasm, he poked his head out the door and sized up the women that stood closest. Deviating from his usual interests, he indicated a small, young brunette. “You. Comes here.”


End file.
